<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Where Is My Mind by FinnsKeeper</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25488691">Where Is My Mind</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/FinnsKeeper/pseuds/FinnsKeeper'>FinnsKeeper</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Critical Role (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Beau is Having a Bad Day, Empire Kids, Empire Siblings - Freeform, Gen, Tumblr Prompt, Writing Prompt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 02:53:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,232</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25488691</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/FinnsKeeper/pseuds/FinnsKeeper</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Caleb saw the sickly green tendrils of energy snake by him and lash out toward Beauregard. He tried to counter, thrusting his fingers toward the fiend at his back to interrupt its arcane connection, but it was too strong. The spell slammed into Beauregard, halting her in her tracks and sending her to her knees, her face contorted in extreme pain. He called her name, but there was no response. Ignoring the enemy at his back, he rushed to her side and gripped her shoulders in an effort to haul her to her feet. Wild eyes met his as she looked up, and Caleb’s stomach lurched in realization.</i>
</p><p>Empire Siblings Tumblr Prompt: Someone gets feebleminded</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Beauregard Lionett &amp; Caleb Widogast</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>184</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Where Is My Mind</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“What the fuck is this thing?” Beau reared back and drove her fist into the jackal-like face of the beast in front of her, reveling in the satisfying crunch of something breaking beneath her blow. The creature snarled, its lips curling away from sharp, bloody teeth. There was intelligence in its beady eyes, and malice. Beau snarled in response as it spat something at her in a language she didn't recognize.</p><p>“Not sure!” Fjord returned. “Why don’t you ask it politely?” He raised the Star Razor and thrust it forward, sending three bolts of greenish energy toward the fiend. Two of them struck true and it snarled viciously. Before she could blink, it zipped away from her and muttered something in a guttural tongue. The dull gray landscape around them darkened with the evil energies swirling around its form as it held its hand aloft.</p><p>“He’s calling for help!” Yasha warned, covering the distance between her and their foe in four long strides, bringing Skingorger down in a vicious arc. It connected, but not before the beast finished the incantation. Beau turned her head in time to see another one, nearly identical except for the reddish tint to its matted fur, pop into view just behind Caleb. Leaving their first enemy to Yasha, Beau deftly side-stepped just enough to allow Veth’s bolts to whiz by her head, but the second creature barely noticed their impact as it raised a finger toward her charging form. She tried to dodge, but the magic enveloped her. Blinding pain erupted just behind her eyes, sending her crashing to her knees, all thought lost in the agony that overwhelmed her.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>* * *</p>
</div>Caleb saw the sickly green tendrils of energy snake by him and lash out toward Beauregard. He tried to counter, thrusting his fingers toward the fiend at his back to interrupt its arcane connection, but it was too strong. The spell slammed into Beauregard, halting her in her tracks and sending her to her knees, her face contorted in extreme pain. He called her name, but there was no response. Ignoring the enemy at his back, he rushed to her side and gripped her shoulders in an effort to haul her to her feet. Wild eyes met his as she looked up, and Caleb’s stomach lurched in realization.<p>“<i>Mist</i>.” He’d read about the higher level magics, the ones that held the power to craft worlds or tear minds asunder, but he’d never seen their effects. And this one…<i>not the time</i>, he reminded himself. “Okay, Beauregard. I know you don’t understand me, but I need you to get up. We have to get you somewhere safe.” He glanced around the hellish landscape for any sort of cover, but the nearest outcropping of drab, gray rock was too far. “Beauregard has been hit!” He called out. “She needs help.”</p><p>Fjord had turned his attention to the second fiend, but at Caleb’s cry he glanced over with a frown. “Caduceus?”</p><p>“Down!” Veth called from her vantage point. “He’s stable but out of it.”</p><p>“Jester!” Fjord looked around for their other cleric, but Jester was all the way on the other side of the battlefield handling the two little imps that had been the scouting party for the larger creature that had ambushed them. </p><p>“I’m coming!” Jester called, smashing the last imp with her serrated lollipop as she dashed over. Before she could reach Beauregard, however, the first jackal-headed fiend raised his hand and aimed it directly at Caleb’s head. He tried another counterspell, but that, too, failed. He could only watch as the gray-white energy sailed toward him, and instinctively he turned his back to shield Beauregard from the blow.</p><p>With his eyes closed, he could only feel the effects of the spell. It was like being squeezed very quickly through a space that was too small, and for a moment he feared that he would be crushed. But then the sensation vanished, and he sucked in a sharp breath, surprised to find it cold—much colder than the hellishly hot climate they had just been in.</p><p>Opening his eyes, he was surprised to see a field of snowy grass. To the right, a large mountain range rose above the clouds and to the left a cold, hard-packed road wound around a hill and out of sight. It took only a moment for his mind to work out what had happened; they’d banished enough of their own enemies for the effect to be familiar. He was back on his home plane now, now with no way back to his friends. </p><p>At his side, Beauregard was still clutching at his arms fearfully. Her eyes still darted about wildly, and her short, quick breaths were puffing in the air between them as her panic mounted.</p><p>“It’s alright,” he told her. “We’re okay. I did not anticipate needing to travel on this plane, so I did not prepare any teleportation magic.” He knew she didn’t understand anything he was saying, but as he spoke in soft, even tones her muscles gradually relaxed until she was standing next to him, shivering but calm. “Okay, the first thing we need to do is find out where we are.” Luckily he had thought to change Frumpkin’s form to something more suited to scouting before the Nein had embarked on their mission. He snapped his fingers and summoned Frumpkin the hawk, but he hadn’t anticipated how his familiar’s sudden appearance would affect his companion. She cried out and shoved at Caleb’s chest, sending him sprawling back into the snowbank as she put herself between him and the perceived threat. Frumpkin, for his part, just stared back blankly.</p><p>“It’s fine,” Caleb stood up and brushed himself off, happy she’d at least aimed for a soft pile of snow rather than the rocks a few feet away. “He’s a friend.” He held out his hand and commanded Frumpkin to approach slowly. Beauregard watched the exchange warily, but seemed to accept Frumpkin’s presence. With a silent command, the hawk took flight and began soaring in ever-growing circles away from them.</p><p>“I’m going to go blind for a moment,” he told Beauregard, but she didn’t respond. “I wonder…” Reaching out slowly, he laid his hand on her left shoulder in the same way he always did when looking through Frumpkin’s eyes. Almost immediately she reached up to clasp his hand, as though driven by instinct rather than thought. It made him smile despite their circumstances. “Just squeeze if anything tries to eat us.”</p><p>Frumpkin scouted for almost twenty minutes until Caleb had a good idea about the area they’d appeared in. It was unfamiliar to him, but there appeared to be civilization further to the northwest along the winding road he’d spotted earlier. He called Frumpkin back and returned to his own eyes, smiling reassuringly as he patted Beauregard’s shoulder.</p><p>“Looks like we start walking.”</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>* * *</p>
</div><p>
  <i>Cold. Too cold. Find shelter. Find food.</i>
</p><p>The wind bit at her exposed skin, and she growled in response. Her fingers clenched into a fist even as her teeth chattered together. She needed to get out of the cold. She needed to hunt.</p><p>Sudden warmth settled on her shoulders and she jumped back. The man next to her—<i>friend, safe</i>—held up his hands and backed away. Sounds fell from his mouth, steady, calm tones that mixed with the wind. She clutched at the soft material on her back, happy to at least have some measure to combat the frigid air.</p><p>She walked for a long time, long enough for her feet to ache, before a noise on the wind reached her ears. She snarled and whirled toward the sound, putting her back to her companion—<i>Family. Protect.</i> A warm hand settled on her shoulder but she kept her eyes forward, scanning for the threat.</p><p>The same soft sound from him whispered across her neck. She didn’t know what it meant, but his tone was enough to relax her posture and get her to turn her back on the thicket of trees nearby. This time he kept his hand on her shoulder, tucking her under his arm as they continued walking.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>* * *</p>
</div>The city walls were a welcome sight as the sun had long since disappeared behind the large mountain that butted right up against the city itself. Caleb had sent Frumpkin to scout ahead, but he hadn’t seen much more than the dragon-headed ballistae dotted along the walls and throngs of people traveling packed mud roads. It was enough to give him hope; where there were streets there was usually civilization. The ballistae were more convincing.<p>“Halt!” </p><p>Beneath his arm, Beauregard stiffened and growled at the sudden shout. Caleb held up his free hand and slowed to a stop. “We’re travelers,” he called up. “Please, she needs help.” There was a moment of silence before the gate opened and two guards ushered them forward. “It’s alright,” he whispered to Beauregard. “We’re going to find someone to fix this, then we’ll find our friends.”<br/>
The city was bustling even during the evening hours, but unlike the rough crowd of some other places they’d been, there was an aura of serenity that settled his nerves immediately. It was a bit like coming home, and it was such a foreign feeling that Caleb had to take a moment to collect himself. The guards who had brought them in were keeping a wary eye on them, and Caleb willed Beauregard to remain calm for a few more moments as he turned back to them.</p><p>“Thank you,” he smiled amicably and nodded slowly. “We’re a bit lost and your walls were a welcome sight. Where are we?”	</p><p>The guards exchanged confused glances before the taller one cleared his throat and stepped forward. “Vasselheim, sir. Might I ask where the two of you are from?”</p><p>“Wildemount,” Caleb answered vaguely, recalling the name of the city from a map of Exandria he’d seen long ago. “We come from Wildemount.”</p><p>“That’s quite the pilgrimage,” the other guard spoke up. “Do you have a destination within the city?”</p><p>“We need a cleric of some kind. A holy person. Is there someone like that here?”</p><p>There was another moment of silence, this one longer than the first, before they both burst out in laughter. When Caleb didn’t join in after a few seconds, they both sobered. “You’re serious?” the first guard asked. “This is <i>Vasselheim</i>, sir.” Caleb just stared back, having not gained any further knowledge of the city in the last few seconds. “The Dawn City?” Still no reaction. “The Cradle of Faith? You are a long way from home, aren’t you?”</p><p>“And I will make every effort to learn more about your fine city when my friend has been seen to. Please, a cleric?”</p><p>“Which deity do you pray to?”</p><p>Caleb paused, racking his brain for a suitable answer. He immediately thought of the five gods approved by the Empire, and long-distant memories of his youth almost made him utter the name of the Dawnfather. But then he caught sight of something beneath the guard’s cloak, a familiar wreath and crook symbol that gave him hope.</p><p>“Melora. Take us to the temple of Melora.”</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>* * *</p>
</div><i>Too many. Too many bodies. Too many threats. Protect. Hide.</i><p>She tried to tug her hand out of the tight grasp that held it, but his grip remained firm. His gentle whispers quieted the worst of her anxiety, but every step took them further into the crowd and the instinct to dart into a dark alley was overwhelming. They passed structures of all shapes and sizes, and the pungent smells that assaulted her wrinkled her nose. As they rounded a corner, her friend’s step stalled momentarily as he gazed across the road at an enormous structure with banners that looked like the sky, but then he blinked and kept moving. </p><p>The hard dirt beneath their feet gradually gave way to soft earth, and the acrid smells became a sweet fragrance that went a long way to push the tension from her. After almost half an hour winding through gardens and groves, they came upon a stone structure with a steepled thatched roof and a large fruit-bearing tree rising up from behind it. The two strangers walking with them turned and gestured, then left. She tracked them until they disappeared around a hill. </p><p>Her companion tugged on her hand, urging her to follow. The door opened before they even made it to the stone steps, and Beau tensed for a moment before he shushed her gently. The figure in the door was tall and lithe, and though the sounds she made were unintelligible, the energy she exuded was one of power and safety. There was also something comfortingly familiar about her, and despite the rising panic in Beau’s chest she allowed her friend to pull her into the building without too much fuss.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>* * *</p>
</div>“Thank you for seeing us.” Caleb maintained his grip on Beauregard’s hand, both to keep her from running and to keep her calm. Her sharp eyes darted around the enclosed space nervously, and Caleb squeezed her hand gently. “As you can see, she needs help.”<p>The woman, who had introduced herself as the High Hierophant Ophera, smiled. “Of course. What happened?”</p><p>“She was struck by a very powerful spell. I believe she has been feebleminded.”</p><p>As Hierophant Ophera stepped forward, her hand outstretched, Beauregard reacted violently. Caleb instinctively stepped away when she swung wildly with her free hand, but without intent behind it the blow didn’t land. He stepped back in and wrapped his arms around her, cradling her head against his shoulder with one hand.</p><p>“Shhh, it’s alright. Beauregard. Enough.” He infused just a touch of command in the last word and she stilled. A wave of warm energy washed over both of them, and Beauregard relaxed in his arms. He glanced over at Ophera curiously. “What did you do?”</p><p>“Just a small blessing to keep her calm,” she said. “Bring her over here.” </p><p>Caleb kept a hold of Beauregard as Ophera began muttering, and the smell of freshly tilled earth filled the space. At the end of her incantation, Ophera reached out and placed her palm on Beauregard’s forehead. The earthy smell grew stronger, and a warm breeze ruffled his hair as the spell took hold. Beauregard sagged against him, and he stumbled beneath her weight for a moment before catching his feet beneath him again. She groaned, a low, distressing sound and when he thought she could stand on her own he released her.</p><p>“Beauregard?”</p><p>“Hmmm?” She looked up, weary and haggard, but in possession of her full faculties once more. “What happened? Last thing I remember is—<i>oof!</i>” Her memory was cut off as he surged forward and wrapped her in a fierce embrace. “Uh...what the hell?”</p><p>“Sorry,” he pushed away and gripped his forearms tightly. “Are you alright?”</p><p>“I’m...I guess so. What the hell happened? Where are we? Where is everyone else?”</p><p>“I believe we were banished,” he told her, “and since we were not on our native plane at the time, we were sent to a random point here. I don’t know about our friends, and I was the only way they had of getting home unless Jester or Caduceus rested.”</p><p>“We have to get to them.” She was a flurry of motion as she turned and bolted for the door, but she only made it halfway before she stumbled against the stone wall. </p><p>“You need to rest, child,” Ophera warned. “Come, sit. I will make some tea.”	</p><p>Caleb smirked and waited for Beauregard to push off the wall, ignoring her indignant growl as he laid a hand on her shoulder to guide her to the small kitchen at the back of the temple. “Apparently that’s just a Wildmother thing?”</p><p>Beauregard managed a smile briefly before collapsing into the chair. “My head is pounding.”</p><p>“That will fade,” Ophera promised, setting a steaming mug in front of each of them. “While we wait for your strength to return, why don’t you tell me about how you found yourself in such a dire situation.”</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>* * *</p>
</div>Beauregard listened as Caleb recounted the events of the last day. She remembered bits and pieces, but most of her memory was nothing more than raw emotion and reaction. She couldn’t tell him how far they had walked, but she remembered the way her feet ached. She couldn’t recall how long it had been since their arrival, but she could practically feel the echo of her panic as the sun set and the world around them had grown darker and more dangerous. She couldn’t even name the city they were in at the moment, but she could still smell the sharp pungence of aromas as the evening crowd swelled around them on their way to the temple. Lost in the memory of her own primal reactions, she missed when Caleb called her name the first time. He tried again, this time leaning forward to tap her arm gently.<p>“Hmm?”</p><p>“I asked if you had any idea where exactly we were in the Gray Wastes?”</p><p>“Oh, yeah. Hang on.” She dug into her pocket and fished out her notebook from within her robes. She flipped to one of the last pages (she really needed to buy a new one soon) and found the notes she’d hastily scrawled on their destination. “We were supposed to grab a bone from a...” she squinted at her notes, “...I cannot read that. Monolith? I don’t know. Yussa sent us to Pluton. Specifically the Hill of Bones.”</p><p>Ophera nodded. “That should be enough. Come.” She stood and left her empty mug on the table, gesturing for them to precede her out the back door into the lush field of grass just beyond. Caleb moved first, obviously eager to return to their friends. Beau stood and stretched a bit, wincing at the stiffness lingering in her muscles. As she passed by the older woman, Hierophant Ophera stopped her with a gentle hand on her arm.</p><p>“Traveling the Vesper Timberlands in winter is no easy feat,” she said quietly. “Doubly so with someone who has been incapacitated in the manner you were. Your friend is very brave.” </p><p>Beau looked through the open doorway where Caleb was marveling at the enormous apple tree. A flash of memory hit her again, a warm shield against the cold wind and a steady arm on her shoulders. Beau smiled, both at the memory and at Ophera’s pointed but sincere praise. “Yeah he’s alright, I guess.” Then, a bit more quietly, “Thank you for your help.”</p><p>“Of course,” Ophera nodded. “That is why Melora has put me here. Perhaps one day you’ll return to Vasselheim and I will have need of your services.”</p><p>“Oh, no doubt. Cad’s gonna want to see this place, at least.”</p><p>“Then I look forward to our next meeting. Come,” she gestured toward the door, “let us not keep your friends waiting any longer.”</p><p>Beau joined Caleb underneath the apple tree, and they watched as Ophera gracefully moved her hand in a series of rapid motions, speaking clearly in a language Beau didn’t understand. The air around them shimmered for a moment before a large opening rent the space in front of them. With one last nod of gratitude, Beau followed Caleb through the portal, back to the Gray Wastes and the rest of their family.</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>